I'm not sure if this is a local phenomena or what, all I know is that I haven't seen it anywhere else: the Christmas drive-thru. There are three that I know of--which makes me think there are probably more in other neighborhoods. This entertainment attraction is an invitation to view a dramatization of the nativity scene (story?) from the convenience of your vehicle. It makes me think of fast food; do people really want to take in the Christ child McDonald's style? I'm sure the masterminds of these events would be offended by the question but I'm tempted to make qualitative comparisons and wax cynical about the state of our society. "I'll take one Mary, one Joseph, 2 shepherds, 3 wiseman, an angel and one little baby please." "That'll be $10.72 at the next window."
Another line of thought. Martin said something about a month or so ago that really struck home. It was some aside to the effect that I always like to think I'm the exception to the rule. At the time it stung a little but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. In fact, it's a great way to sum me up: the exception to the rule. Not only do I like to think that things work a little differently for me but I think in terms of exceptions. I don't think I ever let a blanket statement go by (see--there. I even analyzed that one for the possibility of an exception) without thinking of the possible outliers or loops, the circumstances in which it might not be true. I also delight in people who seem to be an exception to some general expectation or other and I have a general knack for sabotaging anything approaching consistency. Maybe I have a problem with authority? I like to think that I appreciate complexities.
The minutiae of this particular day consisted of gumming up my fingers with glitter glue, stringing jingle bells, feigning Santa's confidant and co-conspirator, escaping the rain, procuring oils, playing chemist and aromatherapist, borrowing a perfectly lovely evening dress for tomorrow's dinner, pulling soiled sheets off my bed, concocting a spontaneous 10-minute meal and praising Eden and Soren's artistic approach and product in their personal Christmas tree which is now decorated in their room.
These fragments hardly seem worth posting but in case a few faithful friends wander my way in hopes of a glimpse of my present...
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Saturday, December 11, 2004
Door Open
I've been itching to post for weeks and restraining myself to work on school stuff. Now that I am finally free, all of the mental posts I've been composing have (momentarily?) fled. Daffodil cut her first tooth yesterday, or at least we noticed for the first time yesterday that she has a tooth. That was one of the mental posts: an affair to remember, my infatuation with this little girl. Everything about having her seems easier and more enjoyable than it was with Eden and Soren. I must be forgetting a lot and I do know that I was intensely attached to each of them in turn, but did I have so much sheer joy? Sometimes the height of those good feelings scare me, I'm conscious of the shadow for potential loss or hurt. Whatever the risk, it's worth it.
I've got Christmas on my brain and I've lately become addicted to ebay. I had a couple of successful bids on items that I'm excited about and I keep going back to see if one more treasure has appeared. "It's like the world's biggest flea market," groans Martin--he knows the thrill of the hunt for a true scavenger like myself. It was a triumph to move on to more constructive things tonight (okay, so I lost on something I was already looking forward to as a really great gift). I'm happy to say that this Christmas season has so far been really fun. I guess I've gotten over the initial shock of a tropical yuletide from last year. We have a true Charlie Brown tree in our little norfolk island pine I've been fostering ever since it fell over on day 1 last year. It's been repotted to a sturdier pot, and the branches aren't nearly as stiff as firs so it droops heavily under all its glittering load.
Soren and I both got "freaked out" yesterday. We left around 1:30 to go turn in my term paper(s) and pick up a check for the travel grant I received (only 11 months later...). Daffodil was in the stroller, Soren was on his bike and Martin walked with us as far as his office. Almost immediately after we parted from Martin it started to rain--not bad, just a fine heavy drizzle. First stop was Sakamaki: up the elevator to the 3rd floor, drop off paper #1, down the elevator. Then we went through campus and across University Ave. to Wist Hall to drop off paper #2 (same paper really, professor #2). Up the ramp, through the doors, around the halls, slide under door, back up, wait for thirsty boy at drinking fountain, back out the doors, down the ramp (I mention the doors because they can truly be an obstacle with a stroller). Then back to the heart of campus to Campus Center (so I thought, but wait). Down the ramp, wind around to the back of the building to find the elevator. Soren loves to manage the control buttons in the elevator so he generally goes in first and pushes "door open" for me to follow. With the bike, this pattern meant that he would dismount and hold the door for me to bring in the stroller and then his bike. At this elevator he went in and the door started to close. He started to panic, "mama, mama!" I kept telling him to push "door open" but instead the elevator started elevating with his cries getting fainter and fainter. I was stuck with Daffodil in the stroller and the bike on level G. I waited for a minute thinking he might come back down but he didn't. So I paged for an elevator (unfortunately there were 2) and went up to the 1st floor. No Soren. And I got on the same elevator so I knew he had gotten off, but I didn't know which floor he was on. Most of the buildings on campus are hollow, they are completely open in the middle so I went to the middle and called his name thinking he might hear me somewhere above or below. Nothing. In the meantime, I'm surprised that no one seems at all concerned to help me. I went to the 2nd floor, nothing. I'm starting to sort of panic now too because on every floor he could have gone in any direction, including out of the building. Finally (probably only 5 minutes later, but it was a long 5 minutes), someone tells me there is a lost boy on the ground floor (where we started). I went back down and there he was, helmeted and everything with an icecream in his hand from the nice student who was trying to help him find his mama. He was anxious to hug me and hug his sister, and by now I was practically crying too. After all that, we were in the wrong building so back across campus, through more doors and even 1 more elevator before we were through to go and meet up with Eden at Kanewai (safe with Ene). It rained the whole time. It took about 45 minutes for my stress level to return to normal. That's the 2nd time I've lost Soren; the first was at the swap meet and that was worse. There are hundreds of booths and hundreds of people there and I just turned around and he was gone. That time it was more like 20 minutes before he was returned to me by the police (who it turns out, are permanently stationed there to reunite lost parties about every half an hour), long enough to start envisioning kidnapping and all sorts of dreadful things. Those shadows of loss loom higher sometimes and thankfully(!) have receeded. But that "door in the chest" still stands open.
I've got Christmas on my brain and I've lately become addicted to ebay. I had a couple of successful bids on items that I'm excited about and I keep going back to see if one more treasure has appeared. "It's like the world's biggest flea market," groans Martin--he knows the thrill of the hunt for a true scavenger like myself. It was a triumph to move on to more constructive things tonight (okay, so I lost on something I was already looking forward to as a really great gift). I'm happy to say that this Christmas season has so far been really fun. I guess I've gotten over the initial shock of a tropical yuletide from last year. We have a true Charlie Brown tree in our little norfolk island pine I've been fostering ever since it fell over on day 1 last year. It's been repotted to a sturdier pot, and the branches aren't nearly as stiff as firs so it droops heavily under all its glittering load.
Soren and I both got "freaked out" yesterday. We left around 1:30 to go turn in my term paper(s) and pick up a check for the travel grant I received (only 11 months later...). Daffodil was in the stroller, Soren was on his bike and Martin walked with us as far as his office. Almost immediately after we parted from Martin it started to rain--not bad, just a fine heavy drizzle. First stop was Sakamaki: up the elevator to the 3rd floor, drop off paper #1, down the elevator. Then we went through campus and across University Ave. to Wist Hall to drop off paper #2 (same paper really, professor #2). Up the ramp, through the doors, around the halls, slide under door, back up, wait for thirsty boy at drinking fountain, back out the doors, down the ramp (I mention the doors because they can truly be an obstacle with a stroller). Then back to the heart of campus to Campus Center (so I thought, but wait). Down the ramp, wind around to the back of the building to find the elevator. Soren loves to manage the control buttons in the elevator so he generally goes in first and pushes "door open" for me to follow. With the bike, this pattern meant that he would dismount and hold the door for me to bring in the stroller and then his bike. At this elevator he went in and the door started to close. He started to panic, "mama, mama!" I kept telling him to push "door open" but instead the elevator started elevating with his cries getting fainter and fainter. I was stuck with Daffodil in the stroller and the bike on level G. I waited for a minute thinking he might come back down but he didn't. So I paged for an elevator (unfortunately there were 2) and went up to the 1st floor. No Soren. And I got on the same elevator so I knew he had gotten off, but I didn't know which floor he was on. Most of the buildings on campus are hollow, they are completely open in the middle so I went to the middle and called his name thinking he might hear me somewhere above or below. Nothing. In the meantime, I'm surprised that no one seems at all concerned to help me. I went to the 2nd floor, nothing. I'm starting to sort of panic now too because on every floor he could have gone in any direction, including out of the building. Finally (probably only 5 minutes later, but it was a long 5 minutes), someone tells me there is a lost boy on the ground floor (where we started). I went back down and there he was, helmeted and everything with an icecream in his hand from the nice student who was trying to help him find his mama. He was anxious to hug me and hug his sister, and by now I was practically crying too. After all that, we were in the wrong building so back across campus, through more doors and even 1 more elevator before we were through to go and meet up with Eden at Kanewai (safe with Ene). It rained the whole time. It took about 45 minutes for my stress level to return to normal. That's the 2nd time I've lost Soren; the first was at the swap meet and that was worse. There are hundreds of booths and hundreds of people there and I just turned around and he was gone. That time it was more like 20 minutes before he was returned to me by the police (who it turns out, are permanently stationed there to reunite lost parties about every half an hour), long enough to start envisioning kidnapping and all sorts of dreadful things. Those shadows of loss loom higher sometimes and thankfully(!) have receeded. But that "door in the chest" still stands open.
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